The current poltical campaigns in our little country is turning out to be very interesting indeed. The whole process is doing more for the mental health of Namibians than all government and private sector initiatives combined. It might even ensure that our Medical Funds will become more lean and mean and actually stop hemoraging.

“Why?”, you may well ask. Well, the answer is simple. It is an old adage that has been proven to be absolutely true : “Laughter is the best medicine!”

Laughter reduces pain, increases job performance, connects people emotionally, and improves the flow of oxygen to the heart and brain.

The hyperbole surrounding the myriad of promises being made by the ever more desperate parties who hope to gather some negligible crumbs from the electoral table is becoming more than just a comedy of errors!

Our Afrikaans-speaking compatriots (They are NOT all Boers or Afrikaners!!) say: “Hulle skiet nie net met spek nie; hulle skiet sommer met die hele vark.“

Let's have a look at the more preposterous promises being made - and I freely admit that it was difficult to select between merely “silly” and “senseless” or “preposterous”, “outrageous” and “imbecilic”.

Let's take NUDO, for instance. Its manifesto is aimed at the average citizen, yet the document contains more theoretical multi-syllabics (incontestible, hegemonic, exigency, minimalist, dysfunctional, etc.,) and hackneyed clichés than I can comfortably digest at a single sitting. There are lots of “we will....”, “we need” and “we must”, but nowhere in that whole document of 44 double-column pages does it give concrete examples of how and when this will be achieved … and with what!

The APP wants to play Robin Hood by being “For Fundamental Change and Just Wealth Redistribution”. They start off by quoting Kwame Nkrumah. It is, by now, well-know that the policies of *the Osagyefo*(redeemer) led to Ghana falling from one of the richest countries in Africa, to one of the poorest.

Good example, thus!!

Equally “idealistic and visionary” is the statement “It is our strong and firm believe (sic!!!!!) that we as a nation can eradicate poverty in Namibia within a five year period” Mazeltov!

That should mean all Namibians will be out of poverty by 2014! Good luck!

“We will ….. diversify our country’s export and import sources and ….. encourage our businesses to produce products of superior quality for the export market. Good! Just … what products? Wood carvings, beads, or what?

Reality: We are not industrialised and depend on SA to 80% or more for ALL products you find in our country!

MAG does not make any promises. They are, anyway, scarcely in a postion to do so since they have been hanging on to one solitary seat in parliament by the skin of their (two) teeth - not of their own doing, but through the grace of all other parties.

Pretorius (should that now be “Tshwane-us?) wants religion, minority rights and corporal punishment.

SWANU: Land reform is the hallmark of SWANU’s political programmes and its populist radical motto is ‘Patji Ngarikotoke!’, which means “it is high time that the land rights are restored to the original owners of the land’, an advocacy of ancestral land rights.

Yea! Right! The party's success rating can be gauged from the following: In the 2004 elections, it finished last with 3 610 votes and 0.44 percent of the vote.


To be continued … unless I am tarred and feathered or shot!